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Emotional intelligence & why should you care

Feb 06, 2020

There’s a lot of buzz right now, especially in the corporate world, about emotional intelligence (EI) and your emotional intelligence quotient (EQ).

Experts postulate that EQ is a better predictor than IQ of your success, quality of relationships, and overall happiness in life. EQ is also essential for healing.

Emotional intelligence emerged from research in the 1990’s, and the two men who coined the phrase described it as a set of skills that contribute to accurately identifying and understanding emotion in oneself and others, effective regulation of emotion, and the use of feelings to motivate, plan, and achieve in one's life.

Over the next few weeks, I want to explore emotional intelligence in depth for three reasons: 

1. I want to help women with cancer identify and process their emotions in a healthy way. Many of my clients cannot label the emotions they are experiencing, and many women suffer from unprocessed grief.

2. I want to help our culture at large understand and learn healthy ways to deal with negative emotion. In our society, there is no room to experience emotions other than happiness. We need to change this!

3. I want to help the world at large heal conceptual cancer. I discussed conceptual cancer in a recent podcast episode. Here, I’ll say that the best way to heal the most serious issues of our time, from climate change to gun violence to racism and sexism, is to heal our own emotions and lead by example of how to manage emotions in a healthy way.

I created my own framework for how I think and talk about emotional intelligence. In the next couple of weeks, I’ll dive into each phase more deeply. 

Phase 1: EQ and self-awareness 

Phase 2: EQ and relationships

Phase 3: EQ and emotional spheres

For now, I want you to try a quick exercise.

Close your eyes and take three deep breaths.

Ask yourself: what emotions am I experiencing right now? 

Be sure to use emotion words.

Then ask yourself: how does this emotion feel in my body?

For example: perhaps anger makes your face feel hot, contentment feels warm and expansive, and anxiety feels like tightness in your chest. 

Then, don’t do anything. Let it flow through your body. Just experience the emotion and be present with it. 

Remember: you’re not your emotions, and your emotions are not you.

P.S. Want to use your cancer as a catalyst for emotional self-awareness and powerful change in your life? That’s exactly what Truth & Dare Cancer is all about. If you need help getting started, book a free consultation call, and we’ll explore how you can take the first step. 

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